By Dr. Josh Wagner
Do you ever look around at friends, family, colleagues, or the people you grew up with and wonder why their lives appear to be more successful than yours? Do you find yourself feeling at times you don’t quite measure up, while others seem to be happy and in control? While others are thriving in their work, in their relationships, and in their leisure time, you continue to find yourself grinding through each day overwhelmed by stress and exhaustion.
Revealing an incredibly simple pathway to fulfillment that is completely in your control, I am sharing how unconscious, undeserving beliefs are the primary obstacle standing in the way of your goals, happiness and peace of mind in any area of your life. Here are a few practices that take a total of 20 minutes to implement into your daily routine to flip your deserving switch on and finally achieve everything you want in life.
1. Initial Sensing (2 minutes)
In a comfortable, seated position with hands on your lap begin to sense your body. Sensing is NOT feeling. You are not feeling the temperature of the room nor the feeling of your skin on your clothing or chair. Sensing is being aware of your body’s internal sensation. You may feel a pulsing of the part of your body you are focusing on, like a heartbeat. Give attention everywhere by mentally scanning your extremities and your core.
2. Clearing (5 to 10 minutes)
After connecting to your body through sensing, evoke your strongest visual and or auditory memory of the circumstances contributing to your strongest, undeserving belief. The recollection of the person or circumstance should be strong enough to elicit the hurtful, negative emotion in your body easily and quickly. Add to this by intensifying the emotion, for instance, squeezing your stomach muscles as you focus on creating the negative feeling, or even vocalizing out loud what is happening in the scene.
As a beginner, you’ll find that your mind is easily distracted and often drifts away during this exercise. Don’t let that discourage you. Every time you realize you are no longer feeling the negative emotion or visualizing the memory, come back to it and re-generate the negative feeling.
Sustain the vision and feeling for as long as possible. It’s not easy to do and the more you do this, the longer you will be able to hold the vision and emotion during a session. Once you notice the emotional tension has decreased significantly, you can move to step three. That negative emotion does not have to be gone entirely, just diminished.
3. Emotionalizing (10 minutes)
After clearing, you will find it easier to visualize and feel the emotions of what you want to experience in life. You have just wiped clean your emotional state, which makes it easier to generate new positive emotions. Start picturing what you most want (in the same area of life you just cleared) and generate the emotion this vision gives you. Is it gratitude, joy, excitement, peace? Whatever single emotion your vision most generates, focus on it while holding the vision.
To intensify your emotion, breathe deeply into your chest and focus on gratitude even more intently. Once you sense an internal shift of newfound confidence in your vision and it has been 20 minutes, gently come out of the process. Continue with your day and if you wrote down any notes during the process, make sure to take them seriously and act on them.
Sensing is NOT feeling.
You are not feeling the temperature of the room nor the feeling of your skin on your clothing or chair.
There’s an astute saying, “If you don’t have 20 minutes a day to meditate, then you should be meditating for 40.” It’s not much to ask. You can surely find 20 minutes somewhere in your busy day. Even if you have three children who wake up earlier than you, you can find time, like thousands of parents do, to nurture yourself with this practice. Your children, too, will benefit from your new mindset and perspective.
Keeping the same time each day provides a predictable routine and habit that makes it easier to strengthen your commitment. So if possible, do The Deserving Process first thing in the morning. It is a phenomenal way to begin each day.
To support your effort, consider getting an accountability partner—a spouse, friend, or family member—who can do this process with you and share your journey. Their support and participation are an invaluable asset. Invite someone to read this book at the same time you do and begin the process together. It makes a tremendous difference not to be alone through it. Your commitment to not letting your partner down will strengthen your commitment to yourself. It’s a win-win. Help someone you care about to flip their switch and it will expedite you flipping your own.
DR. JOSH WAGNER is a mindset coach, international speaker and consultant to renowned doctors and their staffs around the world.
To learn more about Dr. Josh Wagner, please visit www.drjoshwagner.com. You Deserve It: The Missing Answer to the Life You Want is available on Amazon and at Barnes and Noble.